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Nun Steals Four Loko From Convenience Store


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Someone needs to tell her that they took all the good stuff out two years ago.

If you had the unfortunate experience of attending Catholic School as a child like some of us did, you know that Nuns are terrifying pillars of devotion to God, with the authority to hit you with a ruler. Apparently, though, this nun didn’t read the nun rule-book (Bible?) all the way through, and she definitely skipped over the whole chapter that says “Thou shall not steal stuff.”  What she stole, though, is the best part of all: This nun was caught red handed giving herself a five finger discount of Four Loko. Aren’t nuns supposed to be celibate, anyway? We’ve never seen anyone consume that swill when they weren’t trying to get laid.

We guess life at the convent isn’t all that’s cracked up to be, and so maybe stealing a Four Loco from a convenience store is this sister’s way of livin’ on the edge. Who knows, maybe she’ll share the malt beverage with the priest in the confessional later on this week.  One thing is for sure: we’d gladly buy this nun a case of the stuff if she’s really that desperate to get wasted.

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