Forget the birds and the bees. We should be learning the cod and the trout.

Scientists in Australia have done some very important work to determine the first sex act in the world occurred between fish known as placoderms (or, more specifically microbrachius dicki -- heh, heh, they're called 'dicki') some 385 million years ago in Scotland.

Yup, it's the first instance of someone getting some tail. Or, in this case, yellowtail.

If you'd like to know the actual science behind it, you can read about the study here and smarten yourself up for your next cocktail party.

When these fish got in the mood, it wasn't exactly the kind of thing pornos are made of. Australian paleontologist John Long, who spearheaded the study, said, "With their arms interlocked, these fish looked more like they are square dancing the do-se-do rather than mating."

Also interesting is that these fish mark the first species to differentiate male and female based on looks, which makes you wonder if one fish ever described another as a "piece of bass."

Sadly, there's no word when the first orgy took place. We'd like to learn more about the history of grouper sex.

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