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Prepare For The Coming Zombie Apocalypse! [VIDEO] NSFW

Prepare For The Zombie Apocalypse
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Read as if your life depended on it, because it just might!

In recent months there’s been several reports, as many as six separate incidents, people high on ‘Bath Salts’ are savagely attacking others in a zombified, cannibalistic state inflicting life threatening injuries and great harm.

Some are even eating the flesh of anyone foolish enough to get in their way. For the past couple of months we’ve heard all kinds of crazy stories where people have been assaulted, even partially consumed by what most eye witnesses describe as drug induced zombies!

For years everyone laughed at those of us who warned and prepared for the coming zombie apocalypse. Who’s laughing now bitches! Sure there’s some form of sick, perverse humor in all this, unless you’re a victim of course. I find it all tragically hilarious! Maybe I’m just an asshole, that wouldn’t be too far off. But I can say I’m a well prepared asshole and for some, the zombie apocalypse go to guy!

I couldn’t tell you how many times someone’s said “If anything happens like a zombie attack, civil unrest, a foreign or otherworldly invasion, WWIII or some kind of mass anarchy I’m hangin’ out with you Critter.” While I certainly appreciate the confidence and welcome fellow survivors, you will be reminded constantly who was right and expected to pull your own weight. Which means you’ll be my little re-loading bitch! I’ll handle the full magazines, you handle the empty ones! A small price to pay for your life…You’re welcome!

Enough of the B.S. and me stroking my ego as well as other parts of my anatomy. Now that the self gratification portion of all this has been fulfilled we can move on. While there are numerous ways to deal with the problem and dispatch zombies none provide the type of range and efficiency as firearms do. That’s a fact! Luckily we have Hornady Ammo who just released their all new Z-Max zombie ammunition. Just in time! It’s very similar, if not exactly the same as their critical defense ammo. It Yields good penetration, great stopping power and is a heavy hitting ballistically sound choice for the job! Check it out for yourself:

INTRODUCING HORNADY’S ALL NEW Z-MAX ZOMBIE AMMUNITION!

JUST THE FACTS! ZOMBIE 101

Here’s what we know right now. These newer generation zombies aren’t infected, instead their symptoms and actions are brought about by ingesting various drugs including but not limited to ‘Bath Salts’. Meaning they can’t transmit the zombie reaction in others. That’s good news. The bad news is a human bite is one of the worst and most dangerous things that can happen to a person. While you might not become a zombie yourself, you could get all kinds of infections, disease and other health complications from a bite. Avoid getting chewed on at all cost.

So far these so called zombies are solitary in nature. We haven’t seen any form of groupings or organization, that’s more good news! We have yet to see what happens when two or more of these B.S.Z’s (Bath Salt Zombies) come together. I’m of the opinion that it will negate the need for action. I think two zombies together would attack one another. They would dismember, eat and ultimately destroy each other. Of course it’s just an opinion, there’s no real facts to back that up.

Another thing to keep in mind is the motor functions, strength, cognitive abilities and reasoning skills are much different than expected. The B.S.Z’s possess a much higher strength level, are capable of moving about rather quickly, are able to perform basic to semi-intelligent functions and thought processes. That means they can run, think somewhat, open doors and could even use primitive to modern weapons. That’s alarming to say the least! You must distance yourself and take advantage of your surroundings.

There’s more, lots more that needs to be discussed and discovered about this new threat. I’ll continue investigating and gaining as much knowledge as possible to combat the B.S.Z’s and the coming apocalypse, our survival just might depend on it. For the sake of humanity I hope your ready to get bloody! By the way if you don’t get the joke you might be one of them…

One last thing. When the zombie apocalypse happens I call dibs on Justin Bieber!

read more zombie news!

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