Dual-Wield M249’s

If you're like me, ever since you saw your western as a kid, you knew that only the baddest hombres could dual wield the hardware. Whether it was the cowboys unrealistically polished chrome single-action-army peacemakers or Stalone doing the same in Tango & Cash, it's the kind of badassery that sticks with an impressionable young person.

Skip forward to grown up time, I won't lie, I've dual-wielded a couple of Glocks. I'm not even ashamed of my mall-ninjaness to admit it's awesome every time I do that.

So there was one time I popped over to Ares Armory to see what kind of deals they had that particular day, and they straight whipped out an M249 SAW for us to play with. Class III automatic. The real deal. And the one thing I couldn't get over was, it was heavy. Really heavy. I pity the poor guy that has to lug one of those around to protect his bros. Loaded up, it's gotta be pushing thirty-five pounds. To do this with one in each hand seems like a feat of strength as well as awesomeness.

Pro-Tip: When you're at the gun counter and someone hands you a western revolver, be sure to roll that bad boy down your arm to let them know, that you know, what's up.